Skinny Jeans, Fat Wallets: Summertime Top 40 Hip Hop and R&B Round Up

A "Chopper"

It's hard out here on the cutting edge. Being interested in innovative music and entertainment sometimes shelters our ears from the sounds of the street. We miss out on things like what your mom listens to on her way to work and what the cute girls sing along to at bars. We may be streets ahead with The Weeknd and Tyler, The Creator, but the rest of the world is raging to different tunes. If you're reading this blog, you know how it is. Skinny Jeans, Fat Wallets is an attempt to introduce you to the sounds that everyone else already knows.

(Meant to be read quickly with an "urban" accent over a mild mid tempo funk beat)

GROOOOOOOVVVEEEE STREEEET!

What's happening Art/Official? It's ya boy Jeff here with an earth- and ass-shaking top 40 round up for your listening pleasure. *Gunshot sound effect* Up on the docket we got Lil Wayne. Weezy hasn't been sleeping on it since releasing 6 ft 7 ft, which was a song meant to be played at the loudest possible volume while driving around residential neighborhoods. Riker's certaintly didn't snatch this little man's flow away.

After Wayne we got a surprising showing from Diddy. You heard that right. The skinny man dancing weirdly in the back of the videos of all your favorite New York rappers released some tunes and it is decidedly NOT HALF BAD!

We also got Miguel, Ace Hood, Chris Brown, Waka Flocka Flame and more coming at ya.

Chris Brown - Look At Me Now feat. Lil Wayne and Busta Rhymes

She wax it all off, Mr Miyagi
And them suicide doors, Hari Kari

This song is fucking good. Chris Brown, besides being a pimp-ass dancer, holds his own in a fast rap battle against the champ of fast rap Busta and Lil' Wayne over a stylishly minimal, weeded-out beat. The video's sweet as hell too.

Miguel - Sure Thing

I'm the reporter baby
You could be the news

First off Miguel's taking a cue from Nicki Minaj and Lady Gaga with that outfit. I aint hating, not many dudes can pull the robot lesbian dressed as Wesley Snipes look off. I got real mad when I heard this track for the first time, but it grew on me hard. It's got all tropes, like that deep voice shit Ludacris loves, but I paid closer attention to the beat and the lyrics and fell in love. This is the music grown-ups fuck to.

Lil Wayne - John feat. Rick Ross

The guns are drawn and I ain't talking about a sketch
I pay these niggas with a reality check

Rick Ross used to be a corrections officer and I think Lil Wayne can't even look at an Ak-47 without violating his parole, but you can't tell that from the song. This is pure gangsta rap at its finest. I don't get the John Lennon line of the chorus, and those bullshit rap analysis sites are giving whack explanations. There's probably something else to it than a dumb John Lennon reference in a song that definitely aint what Lennon would want his soft-ass name attached to.

Ace Hood - Hustle Hard (Remix feat. Lil Wayne and Rick Ross)

Free my nigga T.I.
Soowoo to the beehive
Got a G6 and a G5

I think I just like the track and the one above it because I have this image of Rick Ross and Lil Wayne as best friends running around eating pizza, going bowling due to the collabs they've been doing recently. Both of them just roll up on this track and casually make Ace Hood look dumb as hell, "I get on anybody track and hit that bitch with that Wayne train." Big ups to Wayne for the correct pronunciation of "pollo."

Diddy - Loving You No More feat. Drake

The way you talk to me but still I say I love you,
I'm ashamed you can see it in my eyes,
Momma always told me to respect the woman,
But what am I to do when her parents do not try,

You can take a look at the history of cool by looking at the evolution of Diddy's name. Puff Daddy came from the glitz of the late 90s and P. Diddy expressed the brevity of a post-9/11 world (that was a joke). The simple name "Diddy" now is all business, striping away the excess. If it weren't for Drake this would be a pretty boring song and there's way too much of "Dirty Money," who are the two hunnies that back Diddy up. Drake's nasal flow goes real well with Diddy's delicateness. Speaking of delicate, this is a great example of the difference between "soft" and "delicate." This is delicate--the proverbial hug after you proverbially slap ya girl (don't slap ya girl, ever). Soft is Wiz Khalifa's "Roll Up." Fuck that track. *Gunshot sound effect*

Mary J. Blige - Someone to Love Me (Remix feat. Diddy and Lil' Wayne)

everybody pushing but I don't fall back
and everybody looking but blind to the fact

I'm pretty sure Mary J. Blige actually does that looping effect with her voice. It ain't computered in--making the track twice as cool as I originally thought. I got a lot of respect for Mary J Blige. She keeps to songs about love and desire and unlike some of her peers (yeah i'm talking about Jill Scott) doesn't cheese out and do nauseating socially conscious music. Here she thugs the fuck out with Weezy and Diddy in what may be a Jefferson Airplane tribute.

That's it, son. Before I go want to say one more thing: Nicki Minaj been sleeping on it and Wiz Khalifa blows. Who the hell writes a song bout banging another dude's girl by being soft and dependable and shit?

Article by Jeffrey Silberman